


10 Things about the Conn Smythe Mamas (Trademark Steve Yzerman) That I Headcanon

by kazokuhouou



Series: Conn Smythe Mamas (trademark Steve Yzerman) verse [2]
Category: Men's Hockey RPF
Genre: M/M, Magical Pregnancy, Mpreg
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-01
Updated: 2020-04-01
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:00:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 620
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23434300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kazokuhouou/pseuds/kazokuhouou
Summary: Pretty much exactly what it says, ten things I imagine are true in a universe where the Conn Smythe winners from 1993 on are cursed to get pregnant (thanks a lot, Bettman). So I don't forget if I decide to explore this verse more later.
Relationships: Miscellaneous relationships mentioned
Series: Conn Smythe Mamas (trademark Steve Yzerman) verse [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1685752
Comments: 5
Kudos: 32





	10 Things about the Conn Smythe Mamas (Trademark Steve Yzerman) That I Headcanon

1\. Resisting the curse is pointless. The longer one goes without getting impregnated, the more the curse starts to addle with the winner’s brain until he ends up throwing himself at the first man he sees. Brian Leetch learned that the hard way.

2\. The colloquial term for all of them is ‘Conn Smythe Mamas’. Steve Yzerman trademarked that, ‘Conn Smythe Daddies’, and all variants he could think of. This pisses off Gary Bettman, who’s kicking himself for not doing it first for marketing reasons. (And none of the winners will let him forget that too, as they usually refer to themselves as ‘Conn Smythe Mamas, trademark Steve Yzerman.)

3\. Cam Ward is the only Conn Smythe Mama (trademark Steve Yzerman) to have twins. It’s widely believed that this is because there was no Conn Smythe awarded the previous year due to the lockout, and the curse was making up for lost time. Understandably, this is why they will try to hold playoffs in future years regardless of any lockouts (even Bettman has standards).

4\. No one knows for certain who the father of Jean-Sebastien Giguere’s baby is, as the Mighty Ducks of Anaheim decided to have a sorrow orgy to cope with losing the cup. No one is quite sure if this was also an effect of the curse-specifically, what happens when the Conn Smythe winner is on the losing team-or if this was just the Mighty Ducks being weird (they were always kinda dippy before Disney dropped them), and no one is keen to find out.

5\. The Conn Smythe Mamas (trademark Steve Yzerman) have always been close to each other. Having been the only people to go through this unique situation, they prefer to get advice from each other. Initially it was through phone conversations, but as technology evolved they started using emails and texting. They now have a group text they use to communicate with each other. The previous winner always reaches out to the most recent winner (so Ovi reached out to O’Reilly).

6\. Sidney Crosby is highly respected among the Conn Smythe Mamas (trademark Steve Yzerman) for pulling off what was thought to be impossible: back to back Conn Smythes. Keep in mind that he missed most of the 2016-17 season due to his first pregnancy, and that makes it more impressive.

7\. Patrick Roy threw a giant hissy fit over the group text when Crosby got his second one, as now he couldn’t lord the fact that he had two Conn Smythe babies over them anymore. Martin Brodeur found out from Scott Stevens and wishes he saw that in person. Joe Sakic ended up making Peter Forsberg confiscate Patrick’s phone. Sidney eventually told everyone to stop texting so Geno could knock him up already.

8\. Russia was less than happy about Evgeni Malkin’s pregnancy, though they would have been willing to tolerate it had he picked another Russian to impregnate him. Unfortunately for them, he picked Sidney (he literally walked up to Sid, said ‘make me pregnant’, and made the entire team spittake their champagne), and now he’s banned from Russia. Geno isn’t exactly upset about that either, not after someone called his children ‘tainted’.

9\. Funnily enough, for something that was supposed to ensure a top notch next generation of hockey players, few of the Conn Smythe babies express interest in playing hockey. And it was noticed the only ones that DID express interest are the ones with two Conn Smythe parents. (And they both had to be Conn Smythe winners at the time of conception, which is why Sid and Geno’s oldest has no interest in hockey.)

10\. Anze Kopitar is the father of Jonathan Quick’s baby. Cause I said so.


End file.
